It has been a long time since you started dating. You both complete each other and are perfect together. You have shared moments of joy, glory, grief, and distress. You both take care of each other and know exactly what the other is feeling and thinking; it’s almost like you can communicate telepathically. You are always there for each other, and it seems like you are bound together for eternity. That is what a happy long-term relationship looks and feels like.
But life is not a bed of roses. You have to deal with the exhausting stuff, too: dumb and annoying questions about your relationship. Sigh!
Here are a few pointless questions that people often ask couples who are in a long term relationship:
1. How did you and your lover get together?
It was raining, we both crossed each other, and my dupatta clung to his shirt. I shyly unhooked it, we looked into each other’s eyes, and it was love at first sight. Is this the answer such people expect? ‘Duh’rama! We ain’t here to narrate some epitome of romance.
2. How long do you plan to be together?
We are not in some official agreement with a defined deadline, and we certainly don’t plan our breakups. We will split if you stop being such an ‘ask’hole! Yup, it looks like we are stuck together forever! *smirk*
3. Is he the one you are walking down the aisle to?
Yes! We are certainly tying the knot, and our kids will be named Chunnu and Munnu. We’ll have one boy and one girl. Everything is already planned. FYI, you will not be invited. Interested to know more? *frown*
4. Don’t you get bored of each other?
Guess here’s the reason you are still single! Why do you even give a shit about us? It’s not like we include you in all our dates. We have not discussed our love lives with you. BTW, we are interesting enough to keep each other hooked up even after years.
5. You have been together for so long. Are you sure she is not cheating on you?
Got trust issues? Shower it on your partner, bitch! For Christ’s sake, spare mine. I mean, seriously, can’t you say something that is not as offending as you?
6. Haven’t seen you two together. Broke up?
Yes, we are in a relationship, but we ain’t conjoined twins, you see. We don’t follow each other everywhere. We have our own individuality too. Not being seen together does not mean things aren’t working out. It just means we respect each other and like to have our own space.
7. What’s your base?
Whoa! Whoa! Are you jealous you’re not getting some action yourself? Why is this any of your concern? Why don’t you keep your nose in your own business? Oh! It just occurred to me you don’t have any!
8. Do your parents agree with your relationship?
We have not discussed it with them yet. But we’ll make sure we invite you on this special occasion. We believe you will definitely convince them. *eyes rolling*
The best weapon to use against such people is sarcasm. But if they still won’t give up, walk away! Walk away in silence.