Monday, December 6, 2021

Glee Club: The Top 5 Hilarious Performances

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These lists are always highly subjective. Everyone has their own top 5’s or top 10’s –Best Glee Club Performances, Worse Glee Club Performances, and What-the-hell-was-that Glee Club performances. You may not agree with my choices, so please add your own list in the comments below.

Whether we read about our favorite Glee Club Performers allegedly turning bad or read about things that remind us how much of a Gleek we are, this show impacted us, which is why this selection was difficult. Glee often has extreme, unintentional hilarious moments. This list is not about those songs. This list is mainly about those performances which were made in a cringey way and caused you to die of second-hand embarrassment. Be prepared to sink your head into that oversized t-shirt to cover your eyes.

1.  You can’t touch this – By Glee Club 

Let’s start with the least weird one on the list. But don’t be mistaken, this is still pretty darn hilarious. A bit of context is needed here – something called a GList makes an appearance in McKinley High. It’s basically a ranking of the New Direction members based on their sexual prowess and appearances. Mercedes, Kurt, Artie, and Tina do not even feature on the list, so they decide to perform this rather raunchy song in the school library. Brittany joins in because she didn’t make it to the top 3 spots.

Thus, it begins a rather embarrassing ordeal. From the brightly hued harem pants to the twerking on library tables, this was an even more hilarious rendition of MC Hammer’s already hilarious and pretty badass song. But even after locking eyes with the withered old librarian and saying “U can’t touch this” with fierce determination, they do not manage to actually form a ‘Bad Reputation’ because she thinks it’s cute.

Watch the video just for Baby Hummel’s adorable season 1 wannabe bitch face, Artie’s genuine badassery that reaches its climax with ‘Bad’ in the later seasons, and Brittany’s brilliant dance moves.

Watch this video:

2. Not Getting Married Today

If you haven’t heard the original version of this by Company, please listen to that first. Loads of people have claimed that the Glee version sung by Emma (Jayma Mays) lacks the emotion that is evident in the original. But, let’s not be that quick in judging Emma’s performance.

As a paranoid Emma goes into pre-wedding freak-out, Jayma Mays delivers a song that is perhaps one of the fastest things I’ve ever heard. Forget Eminem, no seriously, forget him for a moment- I had no idea people could even pronounce words that quickly. Which other song could have been more perfect for a runaway bride with severe anxiety troubles?

The whole thing, with Emma’s deer-in-the-headlights act to Will’s utter ignorance of his fiance’s freakout to Mercede’s deep and slow tones- is a marvelous thing to watch. And why is it hilarious? Just listen to the lyrics carefully. Here’s a sample.

Bless this day
Tragedy of life
Husband yoked to wife
The heart sinks and feels dead
This dreadful day

Emma, I can’t find my good cuff-links

They’re on the dresser
Right next to my suicide note.

Watch this video:

3. It’s Not Right, But It’s Okay

The funniest thing about this song is the context. I don’t know why people say Darren Criss is a bad actor because he absolutely nails the scene that leads up to this song. Blaine thinks that Kurt is cheating on him with Chandler; when Kurt fails to provide him with an appropriate reply on questioning and says, “It’s okay!” Blaine goes ahead and says something that actually makes a lot of sense, “It’s not ‘right,’ but it’s ‘okay’?”

Then the weird part begins. For some reason, Blaine decides to sing this extremely confrontational song about cheating in front of everyone, more importantly, everyone who has actually known Kurt for ages and knows him as Kurt’s boyfriend. The HUGE mistake there, bro.

But I was wrong, there is something funnier about this extremely misplaced song apart from the context, and that is everyone else’s expression. At the same time, they sit in that choir room and listen to their childhood friend getting accused of sleeping with some other guy. And quite understandably, for most people, including their teacher Mr. Schuester, the shocking part about this is not that Kurt slept with anyone but his boyfriend but simply that- “Oh my good lord, Baby Hummel SLEPT with someone!” The cherry on top of the already hilarious cake- Blaine never once stops looking dead serious while singing this song.

Watch the Video:

4. Run Joey Run 

This song is also a part of the episode Bad Reputation; Rachel makes a video of herself singing this song to push herself up higher on the GList. She decides to cast Finn, Jesse, and Puck as Joey and herself as the heroine. The problem arises when all three boys realize that they were all asked to play the same role without being told that the other guys were playing Joey too, and since all three of them had a slight crush on her… let’s say they weren’t ecstatic on finding out Rachel’s plan.

But oh Lord, this video, even when taken completely out of context, does not disappoint. This song already had a bad reputation, but I actually started liking this song after hearing the Glee version. Naturally, as a student-made video, the quality is crappy. Scenes like Rachel passionately pleading for her lover’s life in a crowded hallway while the camera struggles to maintain its focus on her couldn’t have been any cheesier.

But that’s what Run Joey Run is- unbelievably cheesy. And even here, the boys- Puck, Jesse, and Finn make it even more ridiculous by maintaining a straight face throughout.

Watch the Video:

5.  Push It – By Glee Club

I can try and explain the context here, but I won’t. Let’s say that you need to watch the video for this one. And try and watch it without your parents behind you… or anyone at all. A few very young school children decide to grind and suggest crawl and pretty much completely demonstrate how the standing-up sex position works on the stage at a school assembly, in front of their classmates and teachers.

Just a reminder- Finn, that’s your stepbrother that you’re grinding on.


However, can we agree that irrespective of what kind of performances they were, we loved them the same anyway?

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