Humans are social animals. They tend to meet new people and make friends. People of similar ideas or mentality grow close, thus forming a group of people with similar interests.
As normal human conduct, even young children tend to do so. There are several divisions into which these young children are split, which eventually, with time, turn into a nearly unalterable group. As children, we are not judgmental, and so,
changing our friend circle is a pretty ordinary thing for us. But with time, the coming and going of new people in the group create envy and jealousy.
As we grow up, we find ourselves in uncomfortable situations due to changes and transitions in life that are inevitable. Now, a problem starts here. Due to emotional and environmental variation, a person of a particular group may feel the urge to join another group. Or find themselves as a part of an alliance just because it’s the most “popular.” And often, even when we’re in a huge group, we might feel lonely and absurd between the most fun people. Eventually, we begin to feel that we don’t “fit in” anymore.
Dilemma Of Exclusion
So, what should we do in such situations? Just leave the set of people we are uncomfortable with or let things go the way they are. If we want to leave, then should it be slow and steady or just an abrupt dismiss? If we decide to stay, should we confront the people about our insecurities or let ignorance destroy us? There are over seven billion people on this planet, so there cannot be a generalized answer for all. For most people, one of the above-given situations will suffice. But some might actually find themselves in some really absurd and unconventional situations.
Ideally, we shouldn’t stay with people we are not comfortable with. But practically, it all depends on whether we can interact and communicate with new people easily, if we can abandon the set of people we have always been with, or are comfortable being in awkward situations till things settle down, etc. For instance, if a person is an introvert or just bad at communication, they cannot drastically change and walk up to new people and interact with them. Thus introverts find it hard to make new friends and often get stuck in a group of people where they feel like they don’t belong!
So, at such walks of life, one should sit back and think. They should think about reasons for their discomforts and insecurities—consequences of their switching pals and possible regrets on doing so. Often taking the advice of some experienced elder or a good friend might help at this point. Then we should take things slow and steady, repairing some of the damages that may occur.
Our main motive should be to be in a position where we are comfortable and content. Also, we must realize that there is no such thing as a “better” or “inferior” group. We cannot say that a fish is better off in the sea than in a river just because the sea is much bigger than the river. We cannot judge the plight of people in a group just because it’s COOL or POPULAR.