Human beings are social animals, and we can’t just isolate ourselves. We want our voice to be heard and want to listen to others. Living alone is not our thing. And in this journey of life, we come across many other people; some stay while others leave. Out of all of them, there’s someone special who takes extra space in our hearts. That someone is probably your ‘the only one.’
It starts with a hello. Who would’ve known that a hello from a person could one day become so great, so special. All relationships, successful and the failed ones, begin the same way. You meet, share contacts, chat, know each other. This is where feelings start to grow. You know why? It is because you are unknown to each other. You are a mystery that wants to be solved. You try to know more and more about each other; even the tiniest details about your significant other feel so important.
You think about that person without even realizing you do. You like the company of the person so much that even when they are not beside you, you make a picture of them in your mind, pretending they are right beside you. Sooner or later, out of nowhere, you find yourself falling in the pool of love.
You can’t get enough of each other. Your eyes are thirsty to have a visage, your skin longs for their touch, your ears want to hear their voice. It’s as if all your senses stop working. Until you see them. Unsure of how you fell into this situation, you feel great. Love has blinded you so perfectly that you see no flaw. You see only perfection, you want to explore each other, you want to go deep into the tiniest bit of their body and get to know as much as you can. That person is your savior, and you become their therapist. You think of your relationship as a replica of a perfect relationship.
This is when love turns the table. You start seeing the part that was hidden beneath the perfection that love was blinding you from. There is no mystery left between you, you have known the person like the words of your favourite novel. You have read it so many times, that now it no more surprises you, no more fantasizes you. The love that was once hungry for each other starts to fade. All the secrets are no more hidden, and they are like an open book. The late-night chats now end before 10pm. You begin to regain your sight. The things and habits that were cute now seem annoying and irritating.
You start feeling confused, doubting every possible thing. This is when your mind questions whether you are still in love or not, or worse, whether you were ever in love with them or not. Everything seems to fade away. You start making stories in your mind which make the relationship even more difficult. You create problems that actually never existed.
This is no exception. This happens in all the relationships. What is love if it has no bumps, no changes, no deviations in emotion? People seem to think just because they love the person, everything else is taken-for-granted. Love ain’t that easy. What would love be if it was meant to be easy? Anyone would be able to chase it. Love is a puzzle, and it gets tougher after every stage, waiting for you to solve it.
This is where most of the relationships fail because they think loving someone is same as falling in love with someone. It’s different. Many decide to cut the knots that join them, afraid of the break-up that might follow. Many decide to resort to various ways of dealing with this situation- they choose drugs, alcohol, or even worse, cheat on their partner.
And out of those many, the very few which succeed are because they understand that these misunderstandings and doubts they are facing are natural. It is that stage of puzzle which is tougher than the earlier one, and it requires more effort than earlier. If you want to work it out, you need to put in the effort. Trying to fill the gap of that person with someone else is useless. Love is not an outside force or an uncontrollable action; it is a decision. You should consciously decide whether you are capable of loving someone.
There will be ups and downs, and times will come when things take a toll on you. It will be difficult, possibly even worse than you ever thought it would. Think of how you are glued to each other till now, that you have been together till now and you can walk together ahead too. In the end, if you can make it work, that’s when you know that you are in love, so much that you are afraid to lose them.
You may know everything about your partner. They might be an open book to you now, but as time passes by, new chapters will be added. And even then, no matter how many times you read that book, you can always pick something new. Relishing the memories you spent together. Never give up on who you love.