Marriages are an institution that is given massive respect even now. Marriages in India are of two types; arranged marriages and love marriages.
Arranged marriage, by definition, is getting married to a person you hardly know. While this screams stranger danger, in most cases, they work; keyword being most.
Arranged marriage is a type of marital union where the third person unites two unknown people. The groom and the bride are selected by parents, relatives, or by family members. These types of marriages were common until the 18th century.
In the early days, the bride and the groom saw each other only on their wedding day. Thus, this arranged marriage was also forced marriage for a few.
1. Pros of an Arranged Marriage
These arranged marriages have their pros and cons. But as elders decided on their life partner, it was safe to say that the bride and the groom will get to have a safe and secure life as elders take good decisions and the best decisions for their children. I hereby tell you about 5 sensible pros and cons of arranged marriage.
1.1. Secure life
In an arranged marriage, parents are the matchmakers. Parents always want their children to marry a person who is equally educated with good earnings and well settled in their lives.
It’s obvious that they choose a perfect match for their child who has all the above qualities. Thus, arranged marriage leads to having a beautiful secure life.
1.2. Close to culture
Arranged marriages are meant to marry a person who has the same nationality, religion, culture, and tradition, and also who has their mother tongue similar. People are so specific in these things that they search for years to get a perfect match.
Of course, it’s required to get a perfect match as both of them spend their entire life with each other building their own new family. Thus, arranged marriages will make the culture and traditions as close as possible and religious issues do not arise at all.
1.3. Family Connections Last Forever
The bride and the groom are fixed by their family. Both families will have a good relationship, and all the connections between the family and the newly married couple will last long without any misunderstandings.
Whereas love marriages, it’s complicated because the bride’s family may or may not like the groom or vice versa. This creates major differences among their families.
1.4. Similar Values
As I said earlier, arranged marriages are decided by parents, as they are well experienced in their life, they will definitely find a good and compatible one who will have similar thoughts, passions, likes, and dislikes.
This will be an advantage where a similar way of living can create good bonding between two unknowns and love begins to blossom gradually among the married people.
1.5. Worrying about Children’s Future is Diminished
Yes! This is one of the major pros of arranged marriage as Indians bother more about religion and culture. In this type of marriage, two people of similar nationality and religion marry. This will not create any problem to decide about their children’s religion, as both of them are of the same religion.
So, worrying about children’s future religion as in the case of inter-religious marriages is completely diminished.
2. Cons of an Arranged Marriage
2.1. Lack of Understanding
Parents may find a person to have similar qualities. But every individual’s unique taste cannot be matched. The groom or a bride will wish to have their own choice of life partner, but arranged marriages will suppress all those wishes and try to make two like poles to get attracted, which is practically impossible.
This will lead to a lack of understanding because of the marriage between two unknowns, who don’t even have any idea about each other’s personal tastes. This will gradually lead to arguments, unwanted discussions, and also fights.
2.2. No Choice of Separation
In India, parents marry their children at a very grand wedding hall, giving a huge amount of dowry to the groom and calling each and every relative, friend, and well-wisher to bless their child as it is a matter of pride and honor.
When all this goes on so well, there is no choice of separation among the newly married couple at all, as they are married in front of many people and it is also a matter of their parent’s dignity and honor. This is not only the situation where a couple cannot get separated.
In case, if the couple is least bothered about society and they want to get separated, their families will not support them as they are the ones who chose them to be together. This creates a situation where none of them is happy.
2.3. Lack of Trust
Lack of trust among each other as both of them don’t know each other well. When there is no trust, it automatically leads to unwanted arguments between each other.
2.4. The Dowry Conflict between Families
In India, dowry is the most common and significant disadvantage faced by arranged marriage. Elders decide about marriage and even about the give and take policy. I meant to say dowry. Yes! Of course, it’s a give and takes policy where people exchange their daughter and money for a highly qualified, well-settled groom.
This system creates conflict among both families when the bride’s families fail to reach the expectations set up by the groom’s family. This also spoils the husband-wife relationship.
2.5. Family Pressure and Forced Marriage
Arranged marriages are most likely to be forced marriages as children are forced to marry the person of their parent’s choice, as parents want their child to lead a good life by neglecting their wishes and suppressing their desire to marry a person of their choice.
This gradually creates a forced marriage that will be of no use; because of this, neither the married ones are happy nor their families.
– Yashasvini
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