If you are a billionaire romance fanatic, then you must have heard of the term ‘sugar baby.’ Or maybe you’ve just started with your first novel, where a hot CEO romances a young, attractive woman and showers her with luxury.
Whether it’s just curiosity or you’re in dire need of cash and want to step foot into the world of sugar dating.
If you have been wondering what a sugar baby is and what they do, then you’ve come to the right place.
1. Sugar Dating
The first and foremost question – What is Sugar Dating? Sugar dating refers to an arrangement between two people where one person offers company to another in return for monetary and other material benefits.
Sugar relationships work as a company-seeking arrangement, wherein return of financial support.
The term sugar is slang used to depict money and luxury. Since the arrangement itself is based on monetary favours in exchange for the company, it is called Sugar Dating or sugaring.
Traditionally, sugar relationships consisted of successful men seeking sexual favours from a young, attractive woman. But with changing times, this perception is also moving forward. Now, sugar dating does not exclusively refer to sexual relations between men and women.
A sugar relationship can exist between a man and a woman, two men, two women, and so on. It can exist between two people or three people or more. People who sugar date each other can stand anywhere on sexuality and gender. These are known as poly sugar relationships.
2. Sugar Baby
When you say what is a sugar baby, most people think of young women, who wear skimpy clothes, are attractive, and ‘date’ older men in return for cash.
However, Louis Vuitton handbags, Chanel accessories, and BDSM is not everything that entails sugar dating.
In a sugar relationship, a sugar baby definition is a person who gets financial support from the other in exchange for sex or emotional companionship. Most sugar babies are usually ambitious young people who want easy cash flow, mainly to support their higher education.
A sugar baby might take monetary favours in return for the company, but they are not always gold diggers.
Besides financial assistance, sugar babies also gain friendship and emotional support through the arrangement. Sugar dating, after all, is a mutually beneficial relationship.
3. Sugar Daddy
A sugar daddy is that person in a sugar relationship who pays the sugar baby in exchange for companionship, either sexual or emotional.
The dominant person in the relationship, be it money-wise or sexually, is called sugar daddy due to the standard male daddy/ female sugar baby relation.
However, when the dominant is a female, they are known as sugar mamas. For convenience, we will be referring to the dominant as Sugar Daddy.
With the stereotypical definition being an older man wanting to pay for sex with an exclusive younger woman, today’s scenario is quickly doing a 180.
Young Billionaires are either inheriting rich companies or are so talented that they’ve successfully earned their name as a CEO. They can easily lavish upon a sugar baby for that sugar dating lifestyle.
3.1. Why Should Sugar Babies Date Sugar Daddies?
Being a phenomenon of societal deviance, sugar babies are marked as people who want everything quick and easy, instead of working for it – “They get money, designer clothes and accessories, luxury vacations. And all they have to do is be sexy and whiny and let an old man hump them”.
However, juggling University and part-time jobs is getting harder every day. With more and more people looking for jobs to get themselves by, the quality of ethics and job environment is constantly decreasing. This leads to students and education-oriented people resorting to dating sugar daddies.
If we deviate from the typical circumstantial definition of what a sugar baby is, sugar babies do not always sugar date for money or luxury.
People also tend to lean towards sugar daddies when they are not satisfied with their generic options in men. Sugar daddies not only have money, but they also, more often than not, have specific tastes in the bedroom.
Sugar babies are often looking for some adventure in their sex life. Getting bored of everyday missionary sex is a good enough reason to get yourself a sugar daddy. Expensive gifts and dinners are just a bonus!
3.2. Sugar Dating Sites
Sugar Dating Sites and Apps are now withholding a new era in dating. It is so much better than wandering through the red-light districts or potentially embarrassing yourself by straightforwardly asking someone to be your Daddy.
The internet and online social sites now provide a way to look for potential sugar babies and sugar daddies or sugar mamas without the need for an in-person meeting.
Potential matches can meet up after they’ve conversed on calls, had video chats, and know a few things about each other. This ensures credibility from both sides.
Some common and credible sugar websites are SeekingArrangement, WhatsYourPrice, SugarDaddyMeet. These websites require you to create a dating sugar baby profile with your pictures, names and, other details in order to date men.
They then match you according to your preferences. The services might be free or paid, depending on the site you are using.
SeekingArrangement is a sugar dating site that is preferred by most. It provides profile verification for security purposes and a free unlimited messaging option.
Some people also look for sugar babies or sugar daddies/ mamas on dating apps. However, many app policies consider sugaring illegal and against their terms and conditions.
First, it is better to determine what you want and then look for a suitable platform to advertise your needs.
3.4. First Date
Preparing for the first date can be both exciting and mind-rattling. No matter how sociable you are, you still need to keep in mind that the dynamics of sugar dating are pretty different from normal dating.
You can still go with the flow regarding many things, but setting up boundaries has to be your priority.
That being said, you should always be clear about your wants, needs, and expectations. Your sugar daddy must be made aware of your level of comfort.
Sugar babies must determine what aspects of their personal life they will be willing to share with their daddies. If the arrangement includes sexual benefits or BDSM, limits must be determined.
While most sugar dates are time-based sessions, sugar babies tend to be Uni students in this sugar culture. They need to plan their schedule accordingly and not compromise with their social, academic, and mental well-being just for the sake of money.
Before venturing into sugar dating, both the sugar daddy and the sugar baby ought to be sure of what they are willing to give and take in the arrangement.
3.5. What to Expect in A Sugar Relationship?
Honestly, sugar dating can include all the aspects of a normal romantic relationship except that the romance is substituted for companionship or a relationship. Your sugar daddy will lavish you with expensive dinners, gifts, luxury dates, and they will also pay you a monthly allowance.
It all depends on the dynamic between you and your partner. Since the arrangement must be mutually beneficial, both parties must communicate effectively. Communication is the key is not just a saying but the reality.
Many sugar daddies will take their sugar babies as dates to company dinners and functions. And the sugar baby has to understand that not digger, takes to you nicely.
You might get ridiculed, called a gold-digger, compared to escorts. A sugar baby needs to be mentally strong to tackle such situations.
If your Daddy protects your honour, well and good. Otherwise, you’re your own Prince. Don’t let anyone get you down.
Sugar dating is not always exciting and adventurous. Mind you, your Daddy may be tired and bored on a particular day and might not want to indulge in your wants.
Real-life accounts from anonymous people state that there were times when their Splenda daddy poured all their frustration unto them, and then there were times when they were subjected to daily musings of their Daddy’s miseries.
Be prepared to sometimes act as a therapist too.
4. Sugar Dating & Sex Industry
Sugar relationships have shifted from sex work to a lifestyle choice. With more and more people seeking emotional company and support, the sugar dating spectrum has widened over the years.
While the primary sugar lifestyle can include sex and only sex as the arrangement, it depends on both parties.
The sugar baby might have certain limitations on what they are comfortable with. The sugar daddy has to also exclusively clarify their intentions and what kind of company they are seeking.
Though most novels and TV shows tend to sexualize a sugar relationship, it is not always so erotic in real life.
If you see real-life accounts from people across forums like Reddit, Sugar Dating might entail a person seeking emotional support or simply needing someone to talk to.
One Reddit user claims that their sister met a sugar daddy online who lived across the county and needed help for depression as they were going through a bad divorce.
Even when a sugar relationship includes sex, it is often termed legal prostitution in countries with some semblance and acceptance of sex work.
Both parties work on consent, discuss the BDSM aspect of the relationship, and might also have a contract drafted for it.
Workers in the sex industry may also be sugar babies, depending on whether they want to get monetary support exclusively.
While most sugar daddies prefer being exclusive, not all sugar daddies care about their sugar baby seeing multiple daddies.
5. Is Sugar Dating Safe?
While online sites provide profile verification options through IDs, pictures, or phone numbers, not everyone does that. Safety concerns are a topic of immense debate regarding sugar dating.
Harassment is a common issue, as many a time, sugar daddies who claim to be rich are not so. If you have set up a date in-person, make sure to have the first few in crowded places.
Avoid secluded places like a hotel room or a house to protect yourself from impending sexual assault.
Do not immediately share your bank information with your potential Daddy. Take extra precautions in sharing only what is necessary, and ask for your allowance in cash if possible.
Cyber frauds are the doom of the present society. You never know when a fake daddy may wipe your bank account instead of filling it.
Instead of using your real phone number while setting up a sugar dating profile, you could always use a google voice number. This will help protect you from phishing or unwanted calls. All you need for it is a google account.
If you use a real phone number, make sure that it does not have any bank account or other information.
Share only public social media accounts with a potential partner at first. Misuse of photographs for porn sites is a common offence going around these days.
Let your sugar daddies access only that information that is either public or which you think will bring no harm to you.
To know more about the dangers of creating an online dating profile and meeting people virtually, read: Scamming in Online Dating.
While sugar dating might be frowned upon by the masses, the millennials are becoming more accepting of it. You should try it if you think it might be your cup of tea.
Sugar dating has its pros and cons, but as they say, “One’s safety is in their own hands.” Do not let the fear of the unknown stop you from being adventurous.
I hope this read quells your thoughts on “what is a sugar baby.”
Please comment on your views, experiences, and anything you would like to say on the matter.
We would love you hear your thoughts on Sugar Daddies and Sugar dating.
-Edited by Steffy Michael|3/7/22