Just as a start of some disastrous event takes building up one moment after another; in the same manner getting through that disaster needs to work out some technique. Check out how to avert the disaster of your life by knowing all about “how to stop self-harm” urges!
A person has to go through different things in their life. Some individuals have the best life, some have a better life and some have a bad life. How does a person’s life differentiate on these bases? It makes it good, better, best, or worst on their experiences.
Every person has to go through different kinds of experiences. Every person has separate incidents. Though the context may be the same a person experiences it way differently than another person.
Every individual has same body parts but the internal working of how it works out depends totally on the heart and mind. Each individual processes both of these valiantly. Just like no one lock is similar to other locks. Just like every lock has one key to unlock it. In the same manner, the feelings of every individual experience are different. Every person has a different heart and mind & they process it differently.
It’s simple in the way we say our likes and dislikes. No person is similar to other people in likes and dislikes. There would always be one thing that differentiates one person from other people in liking or disliking stuff.
Let’s take an example of mango! A mango represents something different to every person. For some, kids it represents a bundle of joy; for some its remembrance of their summer vacation, for some its a precious memory of their grandparents, for some their parent struggles to get the quality food, for some its a reminder of the fun times with their friends, for some its the reminder of their native place. Maybe for some, it might stand as something unusual and incomprehensible.
Some may even hate it as it represents something absurd for them. When every person has some variant of emotions connected to simple stuff like mango. Is it comprehensible to us what would their take on other things or experiences be?
After all the explanations I just have one single question for you to understand others. How can one person experience the same thing as another person? The way you experience it would that be similar to other people experiencing it? I guess the straightaway answer to that is No! How can you even? Our mind, our mindset, our thought process, our emotions, our feelings, and our experiences all work together to make up the feeling that you feel at that particular moment or situation.
All these build-up emotions and feelings need a lot of handling for a person to function regularly or should I say generally in their daily activities. Not every person can take it. To subside it, people usually try coping strategies and lighten the effect, or maybe sometimes for some even want to just feel numb. Probe all tactics that you can try or support on “how to stop self-harm” demands!
1. All About Self-Harm
Harming oneself on purpose is meant to be self-harm. Self-harming behaviors are eliciting activities that produce pain or numb feeling within a person. It’s not on the list of mental health issues but is an after-effect of mental health conditions.
Self-harm is done by people in secret. They never disclose it to their acquaintances. It is usually a secret that they keep from even their loved ones. They might not want others to know about it as they might be anxious about what others may think.
Self-harming activities a person indulges himself in are:
- Cutting sensation
- Burning part of the body
- Banging or scratching your body
- Scalding with hot surfaces or substances
- Eating or drinking harmful things
- Not letting wounds heal
- Overdose on medications
- Intake of illegal drugs
- Too much alcohol intake
These are all activities that a person inflicts on oneself which we call in other words self-harming techniques.
All these activities are a way of fulfilling the void that a person feels due to their experiences. A way to feel more than the void. A coping mechanism of sorts to repress or suppress other feelings “unwanted emotions“.
2. Reason for Self-harm
In the process of subsiding the feelings of guilt, regret, sadness, depression, anxiety, panic, and many more intense emotions that a person normally cannot possesses a hold on; a way out of it seems to be some activity that might leave you feeling numb.
Commonly, in mainstream terms, those are just self-harming behavior that people don’t even realize while doing how disastrous it is for them. For their well-being, for their physical health, for their mental health!
People self-harm themselves due to various reasons. Sometimes, it may be due to mental illness, many a time people experience emotional pain and inflict self-injury that according to them dulls the emotional pain rendering their pain to react.
The urge to self-harm arises in a person when it becomes too much for them to handle their emotional pain or painful emotions that are equivalent to a body exercising physical pain. When they have an urge to shed their negative feelings they distract themselves through the source of self-harming by different means.
Young people with mental health conditions as distraction techniques generally show self-harmed symptoms. It’s a very crucial thing for a person going through that phase as the reason for their self-harm is the thinking that others won’t understand it.
3. Cease Self-harm
A person needs to stop self-harming as they have difficult feelings within them that they are unable to make others understand.
People self-harm when they feel emotions that are hard to handle. Not a reason to self-harm! People use methods of self-harm as a way of punishing themselves for something they might have done wrong. Not a reason to harm oneself! It’s also used as a means to make one feel normal. A behavior of making others aware of how you feel. A means to stop yourself from feeling or getting relief from feelings. Self-harming is also a way out for most people when they are feeling suicidal.
These are all the reasons that a person suffering from emotional trauma or pain uses to implicate self-harm. In reality, these are all just excuses, not reasons that a person gives oneself rather than recovering. Self-harm is NOT a way out of these insufferable emotions. IT CAN NOT BE!
Is self-harming a good way of coping with intolerable events? When the way is not good, how come continuing it can bring good outcomes? Don’t you think it’s just a recipe for more self-trouble and drastic situations rather than recovering means? Doesn’t recovering from something should feel like freeing and not binding something bad rather than the worst?
People inflicting self-harm are just opting for something bad rather than the worst. Shouldn’t your way be good after recovering from the worst?
4. To-do List of Self-harm Urges
Self-harming can be so drastic for some people that it could lead to severe consequences that later on can even be pushed off or solved. It’s like a wound that you keep on scratching rather than treating properly. Wounds should be tended not with just a bandaid but with necessary essential medication that might treat it fully from the core of it.
Self-harm urges are bandaids that are temporary relief not the whole & sole treatment. Dealing with it needs professional help and some techniques that can take you away from resorting to your old ways. It won’t be easy but you can give it a try. Check out these tips to relieve yourself from “how to stop self-harm” in painless ways:
TIP 1: DIVULGE IN SOMEONE
Talk! The whole issue of self-harm starts from not talking about it. Just one person is enough to confide in. Talking about your self-harming issue can make the whole impact and let you know the underlying emotions that might have been the cause and cure of it. What should you communicate and how to do it. This can be your first step in how to stop self-harm:
Focus on your feeling- Rather than describing your self-harming tactics or activities. Reveal and review the trauma that made you act on it. Talk about your feelings. Talk about what feelings you feel while thinking about it? is it what you want? should you be feeling suicidal or do you want to change that? Concentrate on that and don’t divert your conversation.
Communicatie in your manner- Take your time, set your pace! You are free to communicate as your heart feels. You need to be comfortable while talking about it so you can do it in the way you want. There is no need to hurry for others. It’s your issue, you deal with it in your manner. There are no obligations to follow!
Give time to process- It’s hard to give or get the desired reaction after disclosing something like self-harm. Eating disorders or ghosting are not so serious that can be handled but severe injury disclosure can take some time to get over or process. It’s already hard to know that their close ones were going through tough times and they had no knowledge about it. Keep patience and you will be over it soon!
TIP 2: IDENTIFY YOUR SELF-HARM TRIGGERS
It is important not to know the cure but rather prevention techniques! So, identifying your triggers is important to prevent a more severe injury than the final cure of self-harm. It’s a baby steps process. Nothing gets done in a day, Everything takes the time it requires. Hence, know what causes your to suddenly self-harm yourself. What can be your stimulating behavior reason? Identify and then stop. Stop using all that spurs you.
This can be your second step toward how to stop self-harm. Brings relief to a person to know they can turn around from it, they can do it, they can do all to know how to stop self-harm!
TIP 3: FIND NEW COPING TECHNIQUES
The last and final step of how to stop self-harm should be to know alternatives. A person cannot suddenly just stop self-harming. It’s like a habit they developed over time. To shed that they might need new and creative coping strategies that can divert their mind from that idea.
If you suddenly experience emotional pain or overwhelming feelings, you can make use of a stress ball. It can help you release tension and pent-up emotional distress in time. You can also try physical exercise to release your stress. Triggering objects are warning signs so get rid of them all. If you by chance come in contact with it, get stress released by an ice cube or cold shower. It can be of great impact.
If you are comfortable enough get Psychodynamic therapy from certified medical professionals. There are even associations that provide registered charity to mental health or mental illness persons. Spending time doing something that interests you can be of great help. You can even try other ideas as far as it’s to your advantage, not your disadvantage.
For a little while depend on peer support to get you through these tough times. It’s not necessary to be tough on yourself at all times. Try all that you think can help you figure out how to stop self-harm and never give up on yourself!
5. Aid & Assistance
Proper aid & assistance is required when a person wants how to stop self-harm with proper and appropriate help. Peer support is the most important at this time. To feel and be supportive about your decisions and whatever coping skills you adopt is very important.
At most, young adults need direction while dealing with this situation or circumstances. It’s impossible to hold in suicidal thoughts and react in positivity. A self-harmed person needs a lot of assistance either from a professional front or from loved ones (it could be someone close rather than a loved one).
One of the Aiding apps among all the sources and assistance available proves to be helpful in a lot of ways for many people with self-harming, Calm Harm. An app that guides and provides medical professional help to people who self-harm with coping strategies on stopping self-harm urges and overcoming emotional distress through support groups.
Finding The Right Therapist
Seeking a correct therapist may take some time. It’s very essential to seek a therapist who has experience in treating both trauma and self-injury. Along with that, the quality of the relationship between the therapist and the patient is also very important. Your therapist should have a mindset of accepting self-harm without condoning it and is willing to help you work through all the hurdles that you face at your own pace. Trust your instincts and feel at ease even while talking about your most personal issues.
Warning Signs of Your Loved Ones
It’s really important to rectify when you have someone in your vicinity that has self-harming behaviour that you need to look out for unusual activities. Before you know how to stop self-harm, it’s important to know the telltale signs of a self-harming person. It’s very difficult to identify them. As it’s difficult to disclose their behavior to someone else and they won’t be coming to you to disclose it so easily. Their cry of help or indication would be very subtle. Can be detected by these signs. Check these habitual or behavioral signs of a person to know how to stop self-harm within them.
- They might have a habit of playing with sharp objects.
- They might wear long sleeves and long pants even in hot weather to hide cut marks.
- They might be fascinated with dangerous things like fire and play with it.
- They might get anxious about revealing certain things.
These are just some points that you can refer but the case may be different for every person.
Helping Someone Out Tips
Once you recognize someone within your circle who needs your help in knowing “how to stop self-harm”. You need to be prepared for all that you are going to say or react to. Because one mistake can make them lose their trust in you. People who intend to stop self-harm go on with their trust factor once disturbed their anxiety can never be ceased. Here are some tips on “how to stop self-harm” of a person; you can help them out in disclosing and later on overcoming it:
- Deal with your feelings on your own- If you realize someone among your known person has a self-harm tendency and you have various reactions to it. You might be shocked, surprised, weirded, or disgusted, any of your overwhelming feelings don’t disclose them to that person. Deal with it on your own, they already have a lot to figure out and deal with.
- Know about the problem- If you get that your friend has self-harming behaviour then get to know the reason behind it. Learn about their issue. Not just what they do or how they do it; understand what causes them to react in that manner. Are they going through mental health conditions? Are they having borderline personality disorder? Understand their issue. Make it your own and you might be able to help them.
- Don’t judge- If a person self-harms and they are trusting you enough to share about it then don’t even do a single thing to make them question their trust factor. Judgment or Advice or Sympathy or Pity they don’t need any of these. All they need is someone to hear and know and be beside them while they figure out how to stop self-harm or their situation. Don’t judge them in the least bit. They already think the world is on their back and enclose themselves in their shell. Rather be a part of it and try to bring them out of that shell.
- Offer pillar, not demand- When you have someone who self-harms offer them your help. Assist them, offer support, and offer health professional guidance, but don’t demand them to act according to your choice. They already had a lot of difficulty in revealing this side, you bind them with an ultimatum to recover from it as soon as possible or any of these sorts can lead to drastic effects.
- Encourage communication- Conversing about their suicidal or nonsuicidal self-injury can be of immense significance to the person. To do that they might some encouragement on your part. Be sure to provide them with as much as they might need! It’s very important to make them talk about their experience in detail for them to overcome their trauma.
A self-harming person is desperate for even a single tip of help in their favor. All they want is to know how to stop self-harm and overcome their issues. Knowing and understanding it is not at all easy. It’s a very habitual thing for them to self-harm just like how a good person is adamant about blaming himself for an incident.
For this kind of person, doing self-harm seems to be an easy way out when in reality it’s really difficult to do any of it. If a person shows this much courage to hurt themselves can they show the same amount of it for recovering themselves? I’m sure if they give it a try they might be able to do it with the support of family members, loved ones, and professional aid.
For them, all of these notes are like total garbage or a ray of hope at the end of a long tunnel. Right direction and motivation can make all the difference in the perspective. Check out the above article to know “How to stop self-harm” and Get & Give help!